Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Peer Review: Group Two

Katie Arrivas - Your Observation post took me right back to high school in the first two paragraphs, sans the Jamba Juice. I felt the writing introduced me to your surroundings in a very familiar way which helped me understand the tone and atmosphere of your observations. I honestly thought it was a good read and I enjoyed it. Maybe one area of improvement could be to add more depth. The read felt a bit hallow, but for the idea of the post being observations I didn't feel there was a problem with it at all. Your description post was very on topic and very descriptive of his traits. While he's obviously he subject for the post, you say "he" many many times in your post. Any variation on this would help, I think even if you added his name a few times the post would be much smoother.

Kimberly Thomas - Your description post: Thank you for sharing that. Sharing from the heart is always tough, and you absolutely nailed it. Before I knew I was in your group, I read your Observing the Countryside and thought, I like this person. The computer isn't always a place someone would admit to being at all the time. You then talk about outside.. and long story short, you've done one hell of a job.

Nicola Simmons - The significant other post was beyond adorable and also a left me a bit inspired by your child. I'm sure you've read through the post since and found a few grammatical errors which could be easily fixed for next time. Try not to be like me and send your posts in with 5 minutes to spare.

A quick note, I apologize if my critiques are lacking this week. From here on out, this group will have my full attention. A few things were hectic this week and excuses, excuses. Point being, next week I'll be done well before 11:58 pm with much better posts for all of you.

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